


Science Unto Itself

by pyrrhical (anoyo)



Category: The Vampire Diaries
Genre: F/M, SPOILERS FOR SEASON 3 FINALE
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-07-20
Updated: 2012-07-20
Packaged: 2018-05-18 14:50:52
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 434
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5932288
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/anoyo/pseuds/pyrrhical
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Sweetheart, I think you're hysterical," Tyler/Klaus/bane of Caroline's existence said, holding out both arms in an I-brake-for-crazies gesture.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Science Unto Itself

**Author's Note:**

> Original posted 7/20/12 [here](http://softly-me.livejournal.com/211808.html?thread=5571680#t5571680).

Really? Just -- really? 

First, Elena had become a vampire. Okay, sure, fine, whatever. Caroline could deal with that. She'd become a vampire, and she'd handled that just fine. She could handle Elena becoming a vampire.

Then Alaric was dead. Not undead, like in his super-freaky linked-to-Elena dead sort of way, but dead-dead. Which, you know, really freaking not cool of him, seriously, didn't he know no more of Elena and Jeremy's guardians were allowed to die? That had been, like, decided. Unofficially, maybe, but still.

And then -- then! This was sort of just the icing on top of the stupidly spectacular shit cake. Then Bonnie had gone and tried to save everyone by putting Klaus in Tyler's body and the rat bastard had kissed her! I mean, where did he even get off!

Oh my god, he had probably gotten off! That would be so like him! That was sort of just it! If Caroline felt like making a list of all the stupid crap that had happened in the past year and a half in Mystic Falls, she could probably submit it to the CDC and get the entire city cordoned off!

Mystic Falls was through! At least as far as Caroline Forbes was concerned!

"We're leaving!" Caroline shrieked, throwing up her hands.

"I'm sorry?" Tyler/Klaus/whatever said, raising his eyebrows.

Caroline glared at him. "I'm sorry? Is that all you have to say? Oh, no! You don't get to apologize! At least, not like that. In fact, not yet at all! You just get to escort me out of this deathtrap before, I don't know, I wind up a tree-person. Can that even happen? A person in a tree? You know what, Mystic Falls could manage it! And it would happen to me! Caroline Forbes, the vampire-tree-thing!"

"Sweetheart, I think you're hysterical," Tyler/Klaus/bane of Caroline's existence said, holding out both arms in an I-brake-for-crazies gesture.

"Of course I'm hysterical! Apparently my boyfriend has been possessed by a crazy murderer who decided it was a good idea to kiss me! Which would only happen in Mystic Falls!" Caroline shrieked, flailing her arms around.

Tyler/Klaus/thing-of-which-Caroline-finds-pain-thinking pursed his lips. "You realize that if we leave, the we of which you speak includes me," he said.

"Aaaaaaagh!" Caroline exclaimed. "Of course I do! But Tyler's my boyfriend and you promised to take me out of this godforsaken city, so pony up, jackass!" Caroline put her hands on her hips. "God! You'd think this was rocket science!"

"Caroline," Tyler/Klaus/the-one-for-which-Caroline-was-going-to-have-to-come-up-with-a-better-fucking-name said, "sometimes, I think translating you may be science onto itself."


End file.
